Dear Santa...

Dear Santa,

I'm a horse so I don't really know what this whole "Christmas" thing is about but I heard you wear a red suit and bring presents for it. That sounds like my kind of thing. I heard something about some flying equine relative? I'm not sure... I don't think flying sounds like a good idea. Please don't volunteer me. I like to jump and all but... Anyway. For Christmas, I would like you to bring the following:

1) My spinny Likit. I'm not sure where my mother hid it but it was always filled with tasty, sugary things and I really liked it and now it's gone. Tell her to bring it back or replace it. Any flavor is acceptable besides that salty one. Gross.

2) More grass. I know it's winter and all but it's really tasty.

3) If PA cannot get more grass, I'd like a ride to somewhere tropical so I can eat grass all year long. Perhaps Florida? Is there lots of grass in Florida? There certainly are a lot of horses that go there. Ooh! I heard some place named Kentucky is famous for its grasses... Let's try there!

4) A job. My mother has clearly missed the memo that it's time to prepare for the show season. Why aren't I jumping? In fact, she's not doing anything with me! I'm totally fine! I don't know why we're not doing anything. My foot hurt for a little bit there but it's FINE now. We should be working! Women... I tell you. They overreact to everything.

5) As many treats as possible. Bring them on pallets for easy storage. Thanks!

Love,
Digby